lucka 12: oxe

Ho Ho Ho!

Here's some heavy Christmas greetings from your hardest worker, fresh outta the pen this afternoon!

Missed me? I kinda took a long shot when I jumped on that ferry, but man, has this trip been paying off! I get a lot more work here at the ranch, even now when the grass is all hard. And you know what they say: With more responsibility comes...more babes!! I've had my eye on a preeeetty hot piece of cattle for some weeks now. Gonna make my move as soon as I'm done lifting och pulling for today. So, life is good.

Anyway, I don't miss you guys that much, and I sure as hell don't miss the cold, but I guess I'm kinda thankful for you bringing me up and all. Even if it was just to kill me and take my meat later on. I remember that nice summer afternoon when I had done really well with the soil and the fields. To reward me, you guys took me to a shed... and tried to cut me in the groin!! Take away the pride of a bull!? What kind of a family is that, huh?

Of course, I was too strong for that, so fuck you Mr. Karlsson. Unlike you, I know how to work hard and be a family man. I remember that other time when you and your no-good brother tried to take the meat out of poor little Maja. Sweetest gal I ever seen, never done a thing. If it weren't for my horn skills, she'd be in some fat stomach by now.

Gee haw, that was a drag. Kinda got me upset all over again. What I really wanted to say is this: If you're missing one member of your crew this year, he's long gone and not coming home. God bless America.

XOXO,
Martin